Today I’ve been quietly PART of the ART.
There’s a woman I absolutely rate. She makes installations. She is brilliant at it. But she isn’t doing it for the usual reasons. She’s got no motive outside of bringing joy to people. But for it to work she needs hits on her whatevergram.
She found me. I found her. We discovered we both have similar priorities. Whatever she makes for me, I’ll inhabit it and own it. Because she’s brilliant. And doing it for the right reasons. And absolutely swamped in her medium by people who are utterly corrupt.
Yesterday we had a bunch of lovely people come, but they were all the CEO or Art Director of this that or the other well known global brand. They were my first people, before I had a clue how things are supposed to run. I’m sure it was fine but I think as soon as anyone gives significance to a wacky experience it dies. C separated two of these CEOs who came in their moment off, telling them they couldn’t have an honest experience together. I dunno. I think when it comes to people like that I can bulk them. “So, what’s this then, what am I supposed to do?” I don’t want that twice, and my interaction isn’t going to be interesting with someone who controls their entire environment so please don’t make me have to do it twice. I wanted to shout that to C when she gave weight to the interaction and twice separated pairs of high status nightmare people. “NO”! I wanted to howl, yesterday. As then I ended up having interactions twice with people who are so boundaried they have no play left. They’ve been dead for decades. This is not for them even if I’m happy that they came.
I’m here to PLAY with people. And this is a pleasant place for such things. But if you send me people who have forgotten play then that’s that. And sadly you don’t get to be a CEO without withering your play almost to extinction. I’ll still look for it. It’s still there. But fuck. Not the Joy I’ve always found. Too much entitlement.
Ah well. All will be well and all will be well.
There’s so much to be found here. But if people can’t, then they won’t.
—
Ugh. And then just people. Friends. I get home and slam. I’m realising you can still be just a concept to someone you thought was a friend. Bum. I can’t be free in my own fucking home. And honestly I’m not being sociopathic. Ffffffff grumble grumble grumble
AlBarclay 