Fried

London.

I love London, but I love it for the throng when I can handle the throng. Right now it’s just an expensive place. I’ve got friends here, all sorted into pods. I’ve got fish here all automatically fed in their tank. I’ve got a big electronic window into fantasy against one of the living room walls.

I’m sleeping on my sofa tonight, and before going down I’ve been catching up on the latest Rick and Morty, which thankfully doesn’t disappoint in terms of being deliberately obtuse and morally challenging and weird. It’s just a fucking cartoon and everybody wants to wax lyrical about it because it defines itself by being clever. It IS clever. But I’m in on the joke, so I get it, so I feel clever by getting it. I’m basically the target audience. I grew up reading weird sci-fi and comics, and occasionally getting into theoretical conversations like the ones that have given rise to some of the core concepts in the episodes I’ve been watching. But it’s not necessarily the most welcoming tv…

There’s one more to go and I’ll likely cram it down me before I crash even though it’s almost 1am already. Ahhh the luxury of being here in my flat with all my distractions! I can go to sleep when I please, dammit. Because I’m not up in the morning to carry furniture or learn stuff or drive or anything. If I’m going to be in this London where I’m normally freaking out about how I’m going to pay my council tax, I might as well make use of the devices I’ve sunk time and money into for the express purpose of reality avoidance. No work tomorrow. I’ll get to go to a theatre and watch other people work. So tonight I can let the clock tick past 1am and just get another cup of tea.

I’ve got the first second of the latest episode queued up.

I might not get totally up to date tonight though, frankly. I thought I’d cue up the most recent one and then write my blog and see if I had anything left in the tank at all. I’m feeling pretty zonked though. All I did today was travel up from Brighton and then get used to being in London again. But this city – even half shut it’s an assault on the senses. Even just getting from Victoria Station to my flat I saw more people than I’ve seen in a week, all with their individual shit going on.

I’m partly fried by London, partly by the decoy episode I’ve just watched. Incredible TV but dark, and not necessarily helpful to me when I’m really just not used to people. I’ll feel better in the morning.