Fuck

And so here I am with a snake around my neck. I’ve just finished the last of the jobs that I can see coming for the foreseeable future.

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The original director on this corporate film was isolating on this, the second day. Such a shame to lose his genius. He was working hard to get the shots exactly right. With two active cameras he spent hours and hours going over, making sure he had all the perfect shots. Occasionally he told the actors how to say their lines.

It was difficult to interpret his genius, as crew and as actor. He would use his own voice to speak the line, but mimicking was no good if you weren’t him, and we couldn’t interpret him. If you weren’t actually him in his personal head it was impossible to understand what he actually wanted. If he wasn’t such a genius – (and he was, you can tell by his behaviour) – you’d worry that he was merely a self involved idiot with no real clue how to do the basics of his craft, but surfing a career and money on the back of some sort of connection and a huge self love.

Obviously I didn’t think that of him myself. I thought he was jolly good. He did all of the talking excellent well.

When he didn’t show up to work this morning I was surprised. I wouldn’t have had him down as the first person to pull out on an unfinished job just because he could get away with it

I was terribly disappointed that a man of his undeniable genius had chosen to self isolate at the first opportunity and to be replaced by a director who could talk to actors, give playable notes, and understand shots all at the same time.

I’m one of many humans who frequently wear multiple hats in this industry. You’ve noticed this, oh best beloved, as I have written about the pains of being an actor, being a producer, being a writer, being a director… I guess we had a skilled second AD come in to replace our extremely clever first AD. The second AD understands how to make the company gel.. It’s my usual position on a functioning set. The first AD frequently hates people but obsesses over shots and mechanics.

I reckon the dude who made me say “ad hoc” a million times will find a way through what we made in the edit. But today’s filming felt lovely and much more respectful without his peculiar genius.

After work I went to The Lucky Club and saw Brian just before everything shut down. I didn’t realise how lucky I’ve been to get my shit lined up in time for this crisis. All the producing, all the casting, the three weeks on a Netflix and the corporate videos – I’m in a better position than I can ever remember being in as we step into this abyss.

This is going to be terrible for my industry. Terrible. Once again I’m thinking about my friends, the people I care about. They’ve had to make horrible decisions. “It’s that or there’s no work to come back to when this blows over,” says one. There’s no provision for the self employed. What the fuck will happen to my industry? It’s terrifying. This is the beginning…

Author: albarclay

This blog is a work of creative writing. Do not mistake it for truth. All opinions are mine and not that of my numerous employers.

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