Long unstructured rant about protests and conspiracies.

(TLDR Black Lives Matter. And if you believe my made up incel hacker called Sven, you’re a mushroom.)

Of course the whole of London is cold but because there’s been a cold snap since I moved, I’m now convinced that North London is colder than South London. It’s a useful miniature example of all the little cognitive biases that are being satisfied by people with suddenly too much time who are looking for patterns that back up their dislike of various technologies etc. These non-causative correlations that have inexplicably pulled the wellness industry into the same illiterate stinky bucket as the USA alt-right incel nastyboys.

Maybe it IS just colder in North London. Did you think of that? That’s been my personal experience. Oh yeah, so the “mainstream media” – (and by that I mean ANYBODY with careful understanding and proper evidence) – they haven’t said anything about North London being colder, so there’s clearly a cover up.

Listen: you can’t trust the people who have dedicated their lives to geeky and careful forensic understanding of the facts based on careful peer reviewed studies done out of aspy passion – often with no real care who reads them and why. A politician once lied which proves that the only people we can trust are propaganda bots and 34 year old virgins called Sven who live in their mother’s basements despite being bitcoin millionaires.

And it’s ok because Sven is going to overthrow the new world order! Big government want us to think the temperature is roughly the same across the whole of London! If you don’t believe me watch an 8 hour video of somebody ranting or you can’t join the argument because you haven’t done enough of what I have decided to call “research.”

Meanwhile Black Lives Matter, and there’s another thorny one because if I start coming in and saying that yes I agree that we need to fundamentally address unconscious prejudice then somebody else tells me I’m virtue signalling and somebody else says I can’t comment on it because I haven’t experienced it and Sven comes out of his mother’s basement to tell me it’s all a smokescreen to distract us from the real issue which is that Bill Gates and Satan are feeding cold North London children to Hilary Clinton in Pizza Express in warm South London and IT WILL ALL BE FINALLY EXPOSED NEXT WEEKEND except it won’t and it won’t and it won’t because essentially Sven and his mates had way too much weed ten years ago and they still can’t quite countenance why so many people internationally are actually listening to the stuff they made up when they were stoned because they know when you peel back the final layer to get to the core, it’s an onion and there is no fucking core, but the ad-revenue alone is worth keeping the website updated as it keeps Sven with enough skunk to make it up.

As for the protests, so much anger though in the heat of South central London today, and all over the world, and I see why.

George Floyd is murdered by an agent of the law as part of an longstanding ongoing systemic law-enforcement and basic Social problem, and when anger is expressed, “white” people are reacting defensively immediately – posting shit like pictures of “white” kids murdered by people definable in their minds as racially “other”. As if by ceding an inch of ground they are somehow risking something. Not even the kindness and calmness to accept they have a spot of privilege and step back a bit and listen. “How dare they graffiti Churchill,” one of them shouts without looking or listening, seizing on the thing they’ve been after which lets them dismiss the whole issue.

We have to listen, even to Sven and his dupes just to sure, but particularly to people who are angry enough about something REAL to crowd together now in protest, when it’s literally dangerous for their health and potentially fatal for their loved ones. Yeah people will undermine themselves or disruptors will deliberately undermine others by doing stupid or violent shit.

Often if you aren’t in the ascendant you feel your voice is taken away unless it’s amplified by those around you. Sven and his bullshit is amplified by other people seeking justification through patterns and sense, to the extent that some of Sven’s mushrooms are pushing up fruiting bodies that are trying to tell people in the real world that it’s definitely colder in North London and they need to agree or they’re wrong.

The people protesting know that this is a rare chance to be heard and to be amplified. Yeah so they do contentious things but actually why not? Pull the thing down. People need images. A statue of a slave trader chucked in the harbour is a good clear image despite the inevitable defensive fool with his bulgy eyes telling us all tomorrow how after the guy was a slave trader he actually went on to invent Sudoku or, I dunno, taught us all how to ride caterpillars or … well we all know there’ll be something. Oh it’s missing the point. But you know we’ll hear them sawing away on the BBC about what the fucker did with his blood money.

Black Lives Matter. We need to do better. I will be what they call an ally in this, awkwardly, expecting to be blown out for doing it wrong.

But here’s the problem. Nothing is free of awkwardness anymore. It’s complicated to protest. It’s complicated to support the protesters. It’s complicated to disagree with the protest. Anybody having any opinion about anything ever is risking somebody saying “You haven’t thought about x y z and that makes you EVIL”. It’s complicated to be human in the face of this weaponisation of the scorn of people who largely agree with you, but for one detail that you missed WHICH IS WHY YOU’RE EVIL!

I support the protesters. The stuff they’re protesting happens too often. I hope they don’t all take covid home to their neighbours after trying to make people aware of how angry they are. Right now with Boris and Donald at the top of the funnel I think it might be hard to make positive changes through expression of rage. The message might be deliberately smudged by the damage in the short term. But time will hopefully prove better than the chumps we’ve got in charge right now. And we need to make ourselves heard, to try to affect policy, to wake people up.

As for Sven, I am fed up of intelligent people pattern matching and going down rabbit holes that almost all lead to poison and trust me I’ve “done my research” as I find myth utterly fascinating and I don’t think you actually know what the word “research” means even if the myths themselves are very compelling and emotional and sometimes quite epic in their scale. But hey, it’ll all going to be exposed next weekend anyway. Unless it isn’t. Repeat ad-nauseam.

If I didn’t blog daily I’d edit this. I’d go over it carefully and find my argument, delete all the circular ranting and all the stuff that probably only makes sense to me – like imagining people trotting out somebody else’s conspiracy myths as the unknowing fruiting bodies of some nasty fat mycelium…

I blog daily though. And it’s late.

I’m going to bed. Just as well I’m not a daily columnist. My editor would be waking me up at 6am asking me what the fuck I’ve been taking.

Eat cold blog. From cold North London.

Author: albarclay

This blog is a work of creative writing. Do not mistake it for truth. All opinions are mine and not that of my numerous employers.

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