I waited all day for my half brother.
He hasn’t really got a phone, in that he can’t use it and doesn’t check it and I think it has no credit.
About a fortnight ago I got an email entitled “Sleeping on your floor”. Not “Staying at yours” etc. A negative expectation right from the get-go. Since then the dates have changed a few times. He reminded me of a quote of my father’s by quoting it: “Guests are like fish. They start to stink after three days”. He hasn’t showed up at all yet though so the only stink is from his expectation that he will inconvenience me.
I cancelled my evening plans today so I could be in, but now it seems he’s coming tomorrow. He finally got in touch from an unfamiliar number about half an hour ago. I’ve given him a clear window of time to arrive in. If he’s late he’ll fuck up my plans.
In trying not to be an inconvenience to me, he has been more of an inconvenience than he would’ve been if he’d just let me help him. I was gonna pick him up from Heathrow a few days ago, install him in my bed, go to Brighton, and give him the run of the place. Now I’m back up in town and he’s been in some hotel as far as I can see. He occasionally emails me. I’m not gonna babysit him. And my original thought that maybe I could let him stay here while I’m catsitting in Brighton has been abandoned as it’ll be cheaper to just switch everything off and go, and from what I can glean of his competence, I think the place might end up simultaneously flooded and ablaze. It’s not worth the worry.
It’s alright here this Friday night though, and comfy and peaceful and in a way I’m glad he’s not here yet as I can walk round naked and mumble to myself. I’m listening to the party boats on the river outside and I’m cosy and comfortable in this haven of a bedroom. I’m gonna get back to reading my swashbuckling absurd tales of dragons and ships for the rest of the night.
I love my half brother, but fuck he’s bad at tech and communication. And he victims himself into this deferent tone that has no truth to it and drags everyone down. None of us ever look good when we duck our heads. But he’s much older than me. I can’t teach him shit. I can just watch as he behaves like an idiot.
Personal blog today. More of a dump than anything else. Hi. Hope you’re well.
AlBarclay 